Oct 29, 2010

I'm... in the Middle.

Hari ni sepatutnya hari yang bermakna buat my CF. Tapi rupa-rupanya bukan... I yang tak empathy. Obviously, I know nothing! Null! Did a birthday bash for him tapi taklah sebesar mana pun. Ala kadar je... tapi kenyang. 
Tapi riak mukanya sedih. I know he's not in the mood. I know that face. Familiar to me. Tapi I yang tak empathy... kot. Memaksa dia.Sebelum naik angin, my classmates pujuk I and diorang yang pergi panggil dia. Then, dia okay kot. So, it runs smoothly. Tapi lepas tu dia nak cakap something. Macam nak bagi speech. I feel uneasy. Negatives feelings. Yang classmate I pulak dok huha huha. 
Bersorak-sorak. Me? Still sitting like a statue. 
Bila dia mula berkata-kata, dia cakap banyak benda. But mostly about me. We are getting apart. Like a paper which is about to tear. Dia cakap sorry coz not being able to be close as usual. Juga banyak benda. Tapi yang paling focus, about Miss T and him. 
I admit that I'm jealous. Juga dia ada cakap yang I dah ada Cik Nad disisi I. I tak perlukan my CF. BUT... before made an assumption, let's read this story... *I still can't forget that moment*

"Pada suatu pagi, I berjalan menuruni tangga dengan Cik Nad. Macam biasa bergosip-gosip sambil ke cafe untuk mengisi perut. Masa tu dok pening dengan subject Statistics coz petang tu ada midterm exam. Bila dah anak tangga terakhir, tiba-tiba terdengar suara my BF CF tengah berborak-borak with someone. Hati ni memang excited sebab dah lama tak jumpa. Dah berkira-kira nak tegur dia as usual rituals. Then nampak Miss T kat sebelahnya. Still excited. Tak rasa apa pun. Then nampak kami. TAPI dia hanya tegur Cik Nad je. Still waiting. Then dengan laju dia jalan beriringan dengan Miss T. Sampailah ke cafe. I ada kat situ tapi MACAM TAK WUJUD. Not even 'hi' for me. He choose Miss T over me! Am I nothing to you? Dia terus jalan dengan Miss T dan jauh tinggalkan I. Tiba-tiba Mr. WLH lalu kat tepi sambil cakap, 'eh! Kak Ann dah tak makan dengan Mr. B ke?' Haisshhh!! Kalau ada air mata, dah lama bergenang dan meleleh. Tapi hanya sekadar muka dan hidung je merah-merah. Tengok buku Statistics pun dah tak nampak apa dah!"

That's the end of my story... What do you think about that story? I'm okay before that incident happened. No harm. No jealousy
Feel free if he wanted to have another friend.
Mungkin part yang I cakap tadi kot... Sebab I dah ada Cik Nad. Maybe I don't need him anymore. 
You are totally wrong Mr. CF! i need both! I need both gender as my friends. 
I need my girlfriends and boyfriends *means friends*.
But between Cik Nad and Mr. B, can't be helped. It's your own issues and I have no right to interrupt. Getting worst if I do so. Am I right?
Thus, I never choose either one and I'm... in the Middle right now...


4 comments:

AISHA SAAD said...

ehem2, mcm tau jek.
bufday diaa sama mcm kita larh hr nih.
hee~

neway, persahabatan never larik dr selisih paham.
but believe me, from that, u can gian lot of experience later.
heee~

Miss Ann ~♥ said...

u r rite!!
anyway...happy bday~~ huhu

Cik FaRaH said...

hope both of u will get together again. chill ya...

nadia said...

ehm... sabar je la. Hopefuly pas ni keadaan dh kembali pulih. Sy tak suka la nk berada dlm situasi ni lama2. huhuhu....