Empathy, empathy and empathy

Recently, something happened to me. Tak taulah nak cakap macam mana, tapi lupakan ajer 'coz I have another topic to spill it out. Well, tengahari tadi Ann online dan tegur someone from my friend's list. Dah borak-borak, Ann dapat detect yang dia cuba nak tau sesuatu dari Ann. Ala-ala nak korek cerita ler... In other words, kaunselor-tak-bertauliah. Tapi caranya not a genuine counselor setting 'coz it is in a chatroom. Nowadays, there are a thounsands of "online counseling" but that one is not called as a counselling session because:

• Nobody knows who is the client.
• Might have fake identity.
• We, as counselor, doesn't know what kind of facial expressions and body language that our client would express.

Then, my friend had toooooooooo much self disclosure. Maksudnya, dia try nak kaitkan dengan experiences dia, tapi dia "bercakap" terlalu banyak dari Ann. Ada gak rasa kadang-kadang nak provoke Ann. Padahal bonding antara counselor and client is still not in there yet. So, memang kesalahan disitu. Lagi satu, COUNSELOR TAK CAKAP BANYAK BERBANDING CLIENT. Juga, COUNSELOR NEVER GIVE ANY ADVICE. Sebaliknya, COUNSELOR MENGAJAR CLIENT CARA UNTUK BERFIKIR. Use mind to think 'coz every issues have own solutions. Then, dia suka potong cakap Ann. Geram pun ada. Hilang  terus idea nak cakap apa 'coz sebagai client, bila dah start nak bercakap, mungkin semua yang dia rasa tu akan cakap in one shot. So, counselor tak bolehlah nak potong-potong. Huhu...

Genuine? Maybe, 'coz cara dia cakap memang cam nak tau tapi kadang-kadang macam terlebih excited nak dengar my juicy story. Kesalahan tau kalau over excited 'coz nanti mungkin akan hilang information yang kita nak cakap. Then, counselor must be SHOCK PROOF. These words belajar masa Counseling Lab 1. Madam kata, apa-apa yang diceritakan oleh client, kenalah buat muka cool jer walaupun cerita dari client tu agak mengejutkan. Karang kalau buat muka terkejut, client mungkin akan fikir lain. Sila JANGAN buat macam ini yer...

*tak boleh juga buat muka terkejut tapi adorable.salah tu.okay?*

Contohnya, dia buat satu kesalahan, tiba-tiba kaunselor buat muka terkejut. Client mesti akan fikir yang kaunselor sedang judging and gonna sentence him to 'death' because of his fault. *ala-ala dramatic gitu*. So, buat muka cool tapi jangan dok senyum pulak. Kang cerita sedih, tapi senyum, kang client kata counselor gila. ^_^.

So, itulah antara skills yang perlu ada dalam seorang kaunselor. Nampak senang tapi? Fuh! Berpeluh jugak. Tapi perlu ingat bahawasanya kaunselor itu manusia biasa. Macam ada pepatah tu kata "a doctor need another doctor to treat his illness". So, kaunselor pun samalah. Ayatnya macam ni "A COUNSELOR NEED ANOTHER COUNSELOR TO SOLVE HIS ISSUE"...

p/s: cerita ini adalah benar semata-mata. cuma apa yang ditulis ini hanyalah sekadar info dan panduan untuk diri sendiri. tak faham, boleh tanya yer ^_^. it's my pleasure to share with you~~